7 Emotional Regulation Activities to Use With Children and Young People
Emotional regulation isn't simply about helping a child to “calm down”.
It's about helping children and young people begin to understand what they are feeling, how those emotions show up in their body, what may have triggered them and what helps them feel more regulated again.
For some young people, particularly those with SEMH or additional needs, those skills need to be explicitly explored, modelled and practised over time.
Here are seven simple emotional regulation activities that can be used within pastoral interventions, ELSA-style sessions, SEND support, small groups or 1:1 work.
1. The Emotional Check-In
Start with something simple:
How am I feeling right now?
Rather than expecting a young person to immediately name an emotion, give them different ways to communicate it.
They might draw it, choose a colour, use an emotion card, rate its intensity or describe what the feeling is like.
You can then gently explore:
Where do you notice that feeling in your body?
What happened before you started feeling this way?
What do you think you need right now?
Regular check-ins can help build emotional vocabulary and make talking about feelings feel like a normal part of the day rather than something that only happens when things have gone wrong.
2. Body Signals Mapping
Our bodies often give us clues that emotions are building before we consciously recognise what's happening.
Draw or provide an outline of a body and explore what different emotions might feel like physically.
A young person might notice:
a racing heart
shaky hands
tense shoulders
butterflies or discomfort in their stomach
feeling hot
faster breathing
restless legs
headaches
There are no “correct” answers.
The aim is for the young person to begin recognising their own signals.
Over time, noticing “my shoulders are getting tense” or “my heart is starting to race” can become an important early cue to use a regulation strategy.
3. Trigger Detective
Instead of simply asking “Why did you do that?”, explore what happened before the emotion became overwhelming.
Try breaking an experience down together:
What happened?
↓
What did I think or feel?
↓
What happened in my body?
↓
What did I do next?
↓
What might help if it happens again?
This isn't about finding somebody to blame.
It's about noticing patterns.
A young person may begin to recognise that particular situations — unexpected changes, difficult work, noisy environments, friendship difficulties, transitions or feeling misunderstood — make certain emotions more likely.
And once we recognise patterns, we can begin planning for them.
4. Create a Personal Warning Signs List
Ask the young person:
“How do you know when things are starting to feel too much?”
Their warning signs might include becoming very quiet, speaking more loudly, finding it difficult to concentrate, wanting to leave, feeling restless, crying, withdrawing or noticing physical changes.
Write these down together.
Then divide them into:
Early signs → Getting bigger → Overwhelmed
The goal isn't to eliminate big emotions.
It's to help the young person recognise them earlier, when there may be more opportunity to use strategies or seek support.
5. Build a Regulation Menu
One of the biggest mistakes we can make is assuming the same calming strategy works for everybody.
It doesn't.
Instead, create a personal regulation menu.
Explore four areas:
Things I can do
Perhaps walking, drawing, movement, breathing, listening to music or using a sensory activity.
People who help me
Which adults or peers help the young person feel safe and understood?
Places that help
Is there somewhere quieter or more predictable they can access?
Things I can use
This might include sensory resources, headphones, a drink, fiddle tools, drawing materials or another familiar resource.
The important part is that the strategies belong to that young person, rather than being a generic list an adult has chosen for them.
6. Sort the Worry
For young people experiencing anxiety, worries can quickly feel enormous.
Try writing individual worries onto cards or sticky notes and sorting them into:
Something I can do something about
and
Something I can't control right now
For worries they can influence, explore one small action they could take.
For things outside their control, explore what might help them tolerate the uncertainty or manage the feelings the worry creates.
This can be particularly useful for young people who become caught in repeated “What if...?” thinking.
7. Create a Personal Emotional Regulation Plan
Finally, bring everything you've discovered together.
A simple regulation plan might include:
When I notice...
My early warning signs.
I can try...
My preferred regulation strategies.
People who can help me...
The adults or peers I trust.
My goal is...
Something meaningful and achievable for the young person.
Keep the plan accessible and revisit it.
Emotional regulation isn't something we teach once and tick off as complete. Strategies need opportunities to be practised when the young person is regulated, so they're more familiar when emotions become harder to manage.
The Most Important Part
None of these activities needs to be complicated.
A beautifully designed worksheet won't create emotional regulation on its own.
The relationship surrounding the activity matters.
Be curious.
Give the young person time.
Don't force an answer.
Accept that a strategy that works brilliantly one day might not work the next.
And remember that developing emotional regulation is a process.
Small moments of noticing, understanding and successfully using support all contribute to something much bigger: a young person beginning to understand themselves.
Want the Activities Ready to Use?
If you'd like to start exploring emotional regulation without creating everything yourself, we've put together a FREE Emotional Regulation Toolkit.
It includes emotional check-ins, body signals, triggers, personal warning signs, calming strategies and a personal Emotional Regulation Plan — ready to download and use with children and young people.
And for practitioners looking for more structured support, our 6-session Emotional Regulation Intervention provides a complete programme for targeted 1:1 or small-group work.
Created by Practitioners. Designed for Impact.
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